|
My Foundation
My foundation is this child – Sweet, warm and fragrant. I hold him in my arms, And I am healed.
I breath him in; My soul expands.
My heart quiets, And I am healed.
I touch his hair – My spirit rejoices. My mind clears, And I am healed.
©2003 Debra Shiveley Welch
Today You Are Eighteen May 1, 2010
You Are My one Joy in life, Making me complete, As in motherhood, I rejoice
My Sweet Son, I almost wrote “Sweet Boy.” I call you that often but you are not a boy anymore are you? Today you are a man. You can serve in the Armed Forces, vote, marry, buy property – in a word – you are now an adult. I always knew that it was coming; I just didn’t think it would get here so fast. It’s been quite a year since last May. You’ve begun an internship in a popular restaurant, you’ve formed a band and, most important, you have stood up in the defense of boys younger than you. You have faced possible media attention, cross-examination on a very painful subject and facing the very person who has placed you in that position in a court of law. You didn’t do it for yourself. You did it for the younger boys. I am so very proud of you. Many people would have said, “It’s not my problem, I just won’t go back.” But you didn’t. You and your best friend stood up and said, “There are the little kids. They can’t fight back. They must be protected.” At that moment, you became more than my sweet son: you became my hero. Today you are 18 and my heart is full of love and pride for you. You are a good and decent man and I am honored to know you. Mom Today You Are Seventeen May 1, 2009
"Your Future is so bright, it burns my eyes!" Quincy Jones to Oprah Winfrey
Seventeen years have passed since you, my sweet boy, were born. The time has flown by much too fast and I sometimes wish I could relive this time with you, the happiest 17 years of my life. You have brought me great joy, my darling boy. You have helped me through family crisis, deaths, broken friendships and unrealized dreams. At first, you were not aware that you were consoling me. You would simply climb into my lap, wrap your little arms around my neck and nestle there. You could not feel my blood pressure lower, my heart lift and my tears disappear. You were simply there to be with Mama. But as the years have passed, and you have grown, you have sought me out with the intent to give ease when things have gone awry, or I am disappointed, hurt or sick. Your method of comforting is different now: you will put your arm around me, give me a hug, and proceed to tell me how wonderful I am, how I can do it, how I can get through whatever it is that is happening because I am so strong. Your words are wise and soothing, and you sometimes make me think that you are 37 instead of 17. You amaze me! Your dedication to your music is inspirational. You are excelling in guitar and making quick progress on the piano. I love listening to you play, especially when I am writing. It relaxes me, makes me happy, makes me so proud of my beautiful son. Your teachers and peers respect and like you. You are known for your courteous attitude, gentleness and cheerful personality. People like to be around you and be a part of your life. I cannot blame them. I feel the same way. You are kind to your friends, welcoming them when you would rather be alone. You are always there to reach out when one of them is in pain, offering your sage advice, any help you can provide and your friendship. I am sure that all of them realize, as I do, just how priceless your friendship is. Today you are 17 my love. Today we celebrate the luckiest day in my life: your birthday. I love you, Mama Today You Are Sixteen May 1, 2008 Christopher
As a child you have taught me
patience,
Another birthday dawns, and I awaken to the sounds of ducks peeping and quacking, birds singing and splashing water. I stretch and rise, eager for the day: your special day – your birthday! I dress and walk to the staircase. Breakfast and coffee must be prepared and I want to make sure that your presents are well-hidden, although you have a knack of finding even the most "cleverly" concealed gift. I put my hand on the rail and pause as memories sweep over me – memories of the time I stood at the top of these very stairs with you in my arms. It was 2:00 a.m., just twelve short hours since I first beheld your sweet face and breathed deeply of your unique scent. Twelve short hours since, with arms outstretched, I said to our attorney, "Give me my son!" and held you to me for the first time. Twelve, short hours – you had awakened for your two o’clock feeding, and I leapt from my bed, eager to hold you once again. I gathered you up and started for the stairs. Something made me pause. I guess I just wanted to take a moment to once again look at you, savor the feel of your little body in my arms. I stood there, looking down at you, breathing you in once again. You arched your back as if reaching toward me, and I was lost. Sixteen years have sped their course since that day. And yet, I can still feel the thrill that leapt through my heart at that particular moment of our bonding, of our truly becoming mother and son. Memories race through my mind, like a slide show, embedded in my heart and sealed forever until the end of time: memories of adventures we have shared, cities we have explored … memories of raising you and the joy it has brought me. Sweet love, you have placed my feet upon a path which I never want to leave. You have given me a gift far sweeter than I ever believed possible. You have made me a mother. More importantly, you have made me your mother. I have watched you blossom and take on life’s challenges. I have witnessed your struggle to overcome your learning differences. And I have glowed with pride as you grew from babyhood to the incredible young man you are today. In my joy and pride, I can’t help but reflect on our journey as mother and son. Sixteen years! To some it may seem like a long time, yet in twelve short hours, my heart was lost. And it still is. You have held my heart in your hand since that very moment. It’s a nice place to be. Mama Today You Are Fifteen May 1, 2007
I am Your Mirror
I am your mirror. When you look into my eyes, you see how beautiful you are. When you enter a room, my heart lifts up to meet you; a smile of greeting lights me up from within.
I am your mirror. When you look into my eyes, you see love, as my soul embraces yours, revealing to you just how wonderful you are: my friend, my heart, my son. I awoke early this morning, just before sunrise. Slipping into your room, quietly, quietly, I tiptoed to your bed, and bending down, pressed my lips to your temple. Stroking the hair from
your face, I breathed in your unique scent. You smelled of shampoo, soap,
and Tag cologne, like a teenager...my boy, my man-child. I love you, Mama Today You Are Fourteen May 1, 2006
My Love
You have given me the job I never weary of,
My Sweet Son, Fourteen years ago, you were placed in my arms and, from that moment, your soul has been entwined with mine in a union so pure, so loving, that at the very moment of our meeting my soul expanded and rejoiced. Raising you and loving you has set my feet upon a path from which I never want to stray. You have made me a better person because you are such a gracious and generous human being, and I could not but learn by your example. I have watched you grow, not only in body, but in spirit as well, and walk this earth with your eyes and heart opened wide. I have been there as you have gone through surgeries with a courage unequaled in any adult; I have witnessed your struggle to read, only to become an author; I have seen you evolve from having to be completely taken care of to, in turn, taking care of others; I have observed in you kindness, openhandedness, love and concern for all around you, be they the people you encounter or the smallest bird that crosses your path. It is with great joy that I can, without hesitation, say to you: were you not my son, I would want very much to know you; I would want to be your friend. I love you, my beautiful boy, and I thank the Lord above every day for His exquisite gift: you. Mama Today You Are Thirteen May 1, 2005 ADo you know how I know God loves me? He gave me you!@
Where did the time go, my love? It was only yesterday that you were placed in my arms and, for the first time, I saw your beautiful face. The day we began our journey together dawned achingly beautiful with a Dresden-like blue sky. It was a pink day with blossoms and sweet smelling air. Perfect for the arrival of a young Prince! I couldn't wait to see you. Couldn't wait to hold you. I remember when you were placed in my arms. The first thing I did was to breath you in. You smelled so sweet. I learned later that this is a natural instinct of a mother. She imprints her baby=s own special smell into the core of her very being, making it possible to identify her child by his scent alone. To this day I breathe you in - reveling in your unique perfume. A downy cheek peeked from beneath the blanket in which you had been carefully swaddled. I kissed it and then, slowly, lifting the cover, beheld the face of my son. "He does have hair," I cried! I touched it=s shining silkiness, noted its beautiful color, smoothed it down and, unable to resist, gently kissed you again, this time on your forehead. Turning, I walked slowly up the sidewalk with you, my sweet baby, in my arms. The walkway was literally lined with friends and neighbors smiling, laughing, clapping. We all entered the house where I promptly undressed you, counted your toes, your fingers and kissed all those parts a mama kisses: knees, hands, little nose, elbows and feet. It was the most wonderful day of my life and I was in Nursery Nirvana. I was a mother. Finally, I was a mother! The day passed in a blur and suddenly it was 2:00 in the morning; exactly 12 hours since you had come home. I was awakened by the hungry cry of a newborn baby - music to my ears! I scrambled from my bed and lifted you from your lace-laden bassinet. As I straightened, you arched your back, as if straining to move closer to me, and I was lost. That was when I truly fell in love. I felt an electric thrill run through my body and love so profound, so complete, that I was immobile for those few seconds of utter and complete bonding. This was my son, my child, and no matter who provided the "clay" in which your sweet spirit was housed, you were the same person, the same entity that I would have mothered had I provided the flesh which was the temple of your soul. You were my son, whether I had birthed you or no. Those two o'clock feedings became very special to me as each morning I silently, reverently, celebrated the thrill of love that had surged through my heart at that fateful time - the time of our bonding and the beginning of our journey as Mother and Son. I have seen you go into surgery four times for a total of eight surgeries. Thankfully, the clefting of your lip, gums and hard and soft palates was unilateral (one side) - easier to repair and better results with fewer surgeries. Through each ordeal, you have shown a courage that can only be inspiring. I have learned many lessons from you, Christopher, my dear, sweet son. I will never be able to fully express to you the joy you have brought to me; the love for you which fills my heart; the lessons you have taught me. I have never left Nursery Nirvana. I have enjoyed every minute of caring for you, feeding you, loving you. I have reveled in your accomplishments, your triumphs, your ever expanding and loving soul; rejoiced in your unending kindness, gentleness and dignity. The love I feel for you has continued to grow beyond any bounds I ever believed possible. You are the joy of my life and fill my days with laughter, delight and love! I am so very proud of you and always will be. Today you are thirteen, my love. Today you are a young man. Today I am the happiest mother in the world.
|
